Leadership at Home

As I write this I am returning from a men’s conference that was held at a conference center north of Toronto, Canada. It was a historic time for me. My father and I both spoke. That is not unusual; we have led conferences together many times before. What was unique was that my twenty-one-year-old son Mike spoke as well. It was the first time three generations of Blackabys spoke together at a conference. Even though I am a proud father, I must say that Mike did an outstanding job. The altar was filled at the close of the service. People began going to the front to pray before Mike had even officially extended the invitation. It was powerful! The next afternoon, my dad and I were ready to go back to our cabin after we finished eating lunch, but Mike was still surrounded by people wanting to talk to him. Dad and I finally went back to our rooms without him!

Of course that kind of thing makes a father extremely proud. All my life I have wanted to be a good leader. But nowhere have I more earnestly sought to be a person of influence than in my own home. I realize how intimidating parenting can be these days. So many things in our society are working against Christian parents. And the problem is not just the world “out there.” My kids know all my flaws and shortcomings. They see me at my worst. They measure all my words against my actions. It is impossible to put anything by them! They force me to incarnate whatever truth I want to teach them. I do not write this to imply that I am a model parent. In fact, I don’t know of anything that has been more challenging to me or has stretched me more than trying to be the father my kids needed me to be.

I have been most fortunate in my life to have grown up in a godly home. I realize many people do not have the wonderful Christian heritage I have. However I also know that every Christian parent has the same almighty God prepared to work in their lives as they guide their children. There is no greater field of spiritual leadership than in the home. Just because a father or mother is a strong Christian does not mean their children will follow suit. I work with many outstanding leaders who have been successful in the business world and in ministry. But they feel anguish at their inability to influence their children to go in the right direction. If you are in that place, let me encourage you that God loves your kids more than you do. He knows what it will take to bring them to Himself. He wants you to be prepared to be His instrument in the process.

Scripture

In light of this subject of parenting, I was recently struck by the passage in Mark 9:14-29. A father was grieved that his only son was in bondage to a demon. Even Jesus’ own disciples had been unable to set the boy free. The child’s situation appeared hopeless. But when Jesus is present, no situation is hopeless! Jesus’ told the distraught parent: “If you can believe, all things are possible to him who believes.” The problem lay not in the power of God. The critical factor was not the difficulty of the bondage. The question was whether the father truly believed God could set his child free. After years of disappointment and failure, the father’s faith had wavered. He wanted to believe, but years of disappointment had shaken his faith. Yet in desperation he cried out, “Lord, I believe, help my unbelief!” I suspect there are many broken-hearted parents who have uttered this prayer for their children. When everything seems hopeless and everyone else has given up, godly parents cling to their hope in Jesus and ask Him for the faith to believe Him more. If you are in this place, I pray the Lord would grant you the faith you need to see a miracle of deliverance occur in your child’s life.

Reading

I just finished reading Cromwell by Antonia Fraser. It was extremely interesting but I was particularly interested in how it is possible to succeed a great man. So many “great” men and women of history look in vain for suitable successors. It is rare that one of their children is able to replace them. Cromwell’s son Richard could not hold on to the powerful position his father had carved out for him. I am intrigued why this happens in scripture and throughout history. It has challenged me to ask, what must I do to hand down my walk with God to my children?

I would also highly recommend a new book by my brother Mel, Going the Second Mile: Letting God Take You Beyond Yourself, by Multnomah publishers. It is hot off the press and it will challenge you. My prayer for you this month is that God would take you to the second mile in your walk with Him.

Posted by Richard Blackaby at 10:33 am